The First Time Is The Toughest: How to Simply Just Get Started

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Do you know why most people never achieve their lifelong dreams?  I believe there is4411013654 07c281683b m The First Time Is The Toughest: How to Simply Just Get Started one distinct reason why people settle for mediocre and that is simply the fear of the first step. Why they are afraid doesn’t matter, all that matters is getting past that initial step. Realize this one key concept: the first time is always the toughest, after the first attempt is under one’s belt the consecutive ones get progressively easier!  Very simple, very to the point, just the way I like it!

People tend to look at the whole ordeal as one super-tough, ultra massive juggernaut of a mammoth abstract mess!

In my last article I talked about simplifying and making things concrete.  This article continues that approach by taking a major undertaking in your life, a mammoth project that scares the living hell out of you, and approaching it from another angle. Like I said before, I am not in the business to create new ground breaking concepts; I am here to take what already exists and simplify it. I am here to get you to think differently because the old way doesn’t work; if it did you wouldn’t be here…

Here is my concrete portion of the article.  This is a concept that everyone understands and many people have used this example before. 

I bet many have seen a baby begin to walk for the first time.  I have watched all three of my children with this undertaking, and all three times it was shear amazement to me. The determination they show is astounding and the lack of fear is amazing. If you stop to think about it, here is a being that experiences new things every single day of their waking lives. Put yourself in their shoes for a moment and think about the first time you push yourself up onto your own two feet. I can imagine comparing it to an adult standing on the very top of a 6 foot step ladder with nothing to hold on to.  Picture yourself doing that and tell me it doesn’t create some sort of anxiety!  Now imagine falling off that ladder and having the drive to do it all over again until you succeed!

Why would a baby show no fear in doing something as huge as standing up for the first time, not knowing the consequences of falling or possibly getting hurt? Are they super brave, and laugh in the face of danger?

No, I don’t think babies are brave, I think they just don’t know any better and lucky for them, ignorance is bliss!  Their ignorance to life is their key to bravery in that they simply lack the reference to the dreaded “fear of failure” that cripples so many adults in the world.

Our gift of awareness, our ability to analyze our thoughts, is also our Achilles Heel!

Our unconscious mind records every single event in our lives and it records how we reacted to those events as well. The problem is if we fail to consciously define whether our reaction was indeed the one we intended we could end up setting ourselves up for disaster in the future. A baby hasn’t developed that habit, at least not yet…

So, you’re an adult who has dreams (we all do) but you’re too damn scared to do anything about it.  Now what? 

  1. First off, if anyone is telling you that you can’t do it, ditch them! They are a cancer and they need to go, period! They are not in your best interest and all they are doing is projecting their own fears on to you. Misery breeds company…
  2. Second, stop thinking how scary the whole idea is.Really, what the hell is so scary about pursuing your dreams? Are you afraid you might actually succeed? Wow, what a shame that would be, to actually live your dreams… [Insert sarcasm here!]
  3. Next, determine the very first thing you need to do to get started and do it!Don’t be a wimp and hide like usual. You’ve been there and you know inside it doesn’t work…
  4. Once you get started on a new venture, or learning a new skill, pat yourself on the back! You have just bypassed probably 95% of the rest of the world who are content sitting on their butts and complaining how the “doers” are doing it wrong anyway!

Remember this and recite it to yourself every single day while you’re working away diligently at you’re goals, “The first time is always the toughest!”

Thanks,

Gerry

The First Time Is The Toughest: How to Simply Just Get Started

Simplifying the Sophisticated: The Key to Getting Things Accomplished

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5608574681 9380dd67f5 m Simplifying the Sophisticated: The Key to Getting Things AccomplishedHave you ever bought a software program to simplify your life only to give up on it because it’s too complicated to use?  There are many things that are supposed to “simplify” our lives, but when you stop to think about it, all they do is add a higher level of sophistication.  This was a frustrating concept to me for quite some time.

I recently finished my book “The Habit Driven Human”, and it is based on exactly what this article is about, simplifying the sophisticated.  Those of you who have read the book, (if not, you’re missing something very powerful) you see how simple I made the concept of achieving one’s goals.  I did not reinvent the wheel; all I did was take some solid fundamental principles of goal setting and rearranged them to simplify the concept. After reading my book, some have commented to me that they had never looked at goal setting from that angle before.  I think the reason no one has noticed my interpretation before was because we all tend to overlook the obvious, most simplistic methods because we have somehow been conditioned to associate simplicity with ineffectiveness.  As a matter of fact, I believe the concept of simplicity to be completely the opposite. (Remember K.I.S.S., Keep It Simple Stupid!)

I have begun moving in that direction of simplicity and I am making it sort of my mantra…

“Seek simplicity within the complication, because we tend to be more productive and creative in that state of mind.” – Gerry Ayers

I think everyone could benefit from this idea, by seeking ways to simplify by taking a step back and looking at our daily lives, and really take notice of how abstract many things really can be.  Chip and Dan Heath talk about the difference between concrete and abstract ideas and why concrete ideas become more “sticky” to people in their book “Made To Stick”.  They compare two concepts, the word truth and the painting of the Mona Lisa.  Below is a paraphrased concept from the book, “Made To Stick”.

When asked to think about the Mona Lisa, the actual painting pops into your head.  When someone asks you to think about the definition of the word Truth, you have to develop that abstract word into a series of past experiences and try to develop a solid picture in your mind to describe your interpretation of the word.  Which way seems easier to remember, more “sticky”, the painting or a definition of a word? 

So how do we make our world easier to manage? How do we simplify the over-complicated?

First, step back and get the whole picture, the forest if you will.  What is the gist of it?  Can you describe it in 10 words or less?  Forget about details, what is the general idea of it?

“You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.”- Albert Einstein

Next, once you have the general idea and can explain it to grandma, try to associate it with something you already have mastered.  (Think Mona Lisa)

Example:  For a long time, I used the SMART method of goal setting and would spend hours planning my goals out.  It was extremely sophisticated and any engineer would be proud of the level of detail it showed.  It was a work of art, something to marvel at, the problem was, fundamentally is sucked! It was not very functional as the shear level of complication would hinder its true purpose; accomplishing my goals.

After several failed attempts and growing frustrations with the SMART goal setting routine, I realized there had to be a better way.  The SMART method proved to be rather dumb in my eyes and then it dawned on me that the focus was on the “system” rather than the results the system needed to deliver.  I was focusing on the means to the end rather than on the end itself.

“Don’t get bogged down in busywork. Don’t get caught up in activity.  Focus on accomplishment. It doesn’t matter what you do as much as it matters what you get done.”-Larry Winget

That very shift in view point spawned a whole new outlook on things for me. I began to focus more on what I want, and what is the simplest way to get there!

Another example ties into an article I wrote some time ago: Waiting for the Perfect Time.  The idea behind this article is to first get started and then figure out the details later.  That is plain and simple, and is extremely effective.  Waiting to create a plan and make sure the time is perfect is abstract, there is nothing to grasp a hold of and take off running.  If I was still in the abstract “waiting” mindset I would have never accomplished the “28 day challenge”, or started my “14 week challenge” and I would have never written my book.  Waiting for the perfect time is sophisticated, abstract, and hard for your mind to grasp and in turn hinders progress.

My simple method to eliminate sophistication in your life:

  1. Always focus on the end results, what is it you want to accomplish?
  2. What is the one action you can take right now to get started?
  3. Take that action right now.
  4. Develop and perfect the plan that “grandma can understand” only after you get started.
  5. The end is all that matters, how we get there doesn’t.

Thanks again.

Gerry